Mesh Complications Another Woman’s Story

It is my aim to now share stories with you about women from all over the world who are suffering from bladder sling mesh complications.  This elevates our problems far higher than the I quote “small number of mesh complications” that are being told to us by the FDA, most doctors and of course the mesh manufacturers.

I am telling you now that we will not be silent.  By joining hands around the world our voices will be louder and stronger.  You CANNOT silence us.  We are UNITED to change this ‘small’ issue into the giant issue it truly is.  BEFORE surgery, we want women to be given complete information that covers the extent of complications that can occur once this implant has been placed into our bodies.  Then they can make decisions based on the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.  Then they can decide do they want to risk living like we do.

Because of what has happened to us and the thousands of women around the world, we choose to listen to our conscience.  For us to close up shop, hang a ‘gone fishing’ sign on the door and join the never ending silence, is not an option.  We do not want more women loving like we do.  We want them whole and raising their families.  Silence to us is not golden. It is filled with the unheard voices of so many injured women.

To allow you the knowledge of how this destroys the daily lives of women, We are sharing our most intimate details with the world because we do not want other women to suffer the way we do.  I hope you will now read this lady’s letter and take it to heart what it takes to do this.  This is another story from New Zealand.  Like the American women, the Canadian, British, Australian and New Zealand women are joining hands together to share their stories and allow women a stronger voice.

Dear Everyone,

Apologies for the delay in getting this information to connect you all.  I have been awaiting the OK from some, but now I can truly connect you all, as I have had your approval to do so.

Many of you I have emailed individually a few weeks ago – however now that Carmel has done such an incredible  job in setting up the beginnings of what will be an amazing website/facebook  resource (and support for not only us Kiwi ‘mesh inflicted’ but many others) there is the place to meet up and share stories, latest research and information from not only New Zealand  but around the world. 

We are also getting a lot of ‘hot of the press’ information from Linda – check out vaginal mesh (thank you so much for sharing with us Linda)

So where to begin……. well with the fantastic intentions of a young reporter Chloe Johnson to write a story about ‘mesh complications’ and a message from us to  ‘keep the pressure on with the stories Chloe’ about some gynae issue that was more likely to affect her aunties or mothers age group, we have managed to raise awareness and are even seeing the Herald on Sunday stories getting exposure in the US & Canada and now UK. This is a story that needs to be told and so thank you Chloe from the bottom of my heart,  and I am sure also from  many many others for continuing with that.  

 A little about me…. ‘meshed up mary’ – I was ‘meshed up’ 4.5 years ago and am intending to be unmeshed in exactly 16 days time – it’s called ‘explant’.  I never intended to be implanted (as I now understand the terminology to be!) – however, I am hopeful  and at peace with my new choice of Surgeon (I’ve been to 6)  – BUT   I thought I was that with the original surgeon. however, not to dwell on the past, but to look positively to the future.

I am really Patricia (Paddy) Sullivan – I decided to call myself ‘Mary’ as an email contact for us all to approach – that name just jumped out at me.  Perhaps I felt the need  to feel closer to God – also I was not ready to share my personal intimate details with other ‘normal’ people .  I am a Registered Nurse and a Naturopath – but I was still ashamed of what was going on for me even though it was no fault of my own.

 I am now ready to tell my story, because having been involved in the ‘health’ industry for nearly  40 years, I was also confused as to what was going on.  For me – the symptoms were random – my GP had no idea either and I consider her a well informed health professional.  I saw my original (1)  uro-gynaecologist 4 weeks post op feeling more ‘unwell’ than I should have, who sent me to a ..(2) a urologist whose urodynamic testing was inconclusive, (3) another urologist who wanted to put in a ‘sling’ to rectify the ever increasing incontinence (thank God I backed out of that surgery x2 on the op date!! – intuition)  (4)a uro-gynaecologist who thought ‘h,mmm maybe a vaginal stitch erosion – take some antibiotics and oestrogen cream and we’ll wait, to another (5) gynaecologist who freaked me out and said – its mesh complications – classic symptoms and you need to remove it totally as it has never been proven to be safe to (6) a gynaecologist who has listened to me and we have formulated a plan over the past 8 months with the culmination of  a decision to do mesh removal in 16 days time.

(4) uro-gynaecologist did a partial removal of eroding vaginal mesh in May 12 and I still struggle to recover because my body is rejecting what is inside me.  that is the conclusion I have come to.  I am fatigued, have aching muscles & joints, cloudy thinking and sometimes my right leg just ‘gives out’.

I have gone from a fun loving, confident, salsa dancing, tennis playing, happy go lucky continent woman to a cautious, exhausted, aging, lame, incontinent woman whose worse fear is either not having extra pads in her handbag to  losing her luggage when travelling; or worse still standing up and having lost bladder control without being aware. 

The ramifications of the 10% plus failures from routine prolapse surgery are  something that is evolving like a festering sore ,and we need to give as much information out to our ‘sisters’ as possible without scaring them.

 I have recently made a 6 minute film about this – and will keep you informed regarding its release.

 Also, I did a radio interview today and ,will do another tomorrow which is specifically about my ‘mesh complications journey’. 

The contact is

The more awareness we can create, the more change we can bring about.  There is strength in numbers and so we need to join as a strong team to especially support each other emotionally and share our stories.  We will all come out of this better if we have a collective goal…. what that is we need to be clear about.  Different goals in different countries.


So…. in signing off………… I am going to leave you in Carmel’s very capable hands whilst I now focus on a bit of a holiday before the  22/11.  I am going to try to not think about mesh and pain for 1 week if possible…….

hopefully I will be able to share the story of meshedupmary to meshfree!!!!!!!!!!!!!

with love and understanding

 Patricia (Paddy) Sullivan aka mary mesh

Thank you Paddy for joining the ranks of the outspoken.  You will now be saving many women’s lives.  Giving them hope when they have none.  Giving them a voice that is silent.  I appreciate yours and Carmel’s efforts and work to bring about this change.

If you want to read Carmel’s story, this blog will take you there.

If you would like to share your story with the world either using your name or not, you can email me.  My address is on the top right hand corner.



  1. Chloe Johnson

    Paddy, I have only just come across this now and was humbled to see your courage and bravery in revealing your real name. I know you were very reluctant to do so during our conversations, which is why you became Mary. Thank you for the mention of my reporting, it’s nice to know stories are appreciated. Although I have left the Herald on Sunday, I am not giving up on reporting the issue as I often think about everyone who wrote to me, and those I spoke to. I’ve been in touch with Carmel recently to offer my help. Will hopefully talk again soon.
    Chloe Johnson

    1. lavalinda

      Chloe I don’t know you but I gather you are a reporter in New Zealand. This is a world wide problem and so many women suffer. I am glad you are on board to help.


Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.